THE WAY TO LIVE_DOT III (YOUR ROLE) // CHAPTER 20

“Wait a second,” you might say. “There is an and attached to love in the Bible. Truth.”[1]

That is true. There is love and there is truth.

The concept of truth is extensive. The prevailing attitudes in culture would tell us that truth is subjective. Truth is a social construct; that is not at all what Jesus or Scripture represents. The concept of truth is settled.

John 1 tells us that Jesus came in grace and truth. In John 8, Jesus tells us that we will know the truth and the truth will set us free. In John 14, Jesus declares that he is the way, the truth and the life. Objective truth matters. Objective truth exists. And it exists in the life and person of Jesus.

Paul says it this way:

This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ. Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love. // Ephesians 4:13–16

We must speak the truth. But even in speaking truth, we must follow the Great Commandment. Speaking the truth doesn’t create a loophole that allows us to be unloving. You may have been mad at me earlier when I mentioned the treatment of Muslims, the LGBT+ community or people you just may not like. You may feel entitled to be intolerant or unforgiving because of “truth.” If you do that, you’re leaving out the other part of the equation.

Yes, Jesus is truth. But he gave us a gift. Grace. This is the same gift that he wants us to give to other people.

The balance between grace and truth is love. That is what Paul brings to the forefront. We must speak the truth. But we must do so in such a way that people feel our love—and God’s love too.

That’s hard. Love requires care. Love requires empathy. Love requires a lot of things according to 1 Corinthians 13. Love requires that I connect with you before I correct you. Love requires that I make sure you understand how much I want what is best for you. Love requires that when I tell you the truth, I do so with the intent to help you, not hurt you.

Jesus was great at correction. He was also great at connection. Too many Christians make it their goal and purpose to “speak truth” and make love an afterthought. They want to correct people without connecting with them. Truth by itself is not loving, it’s harsh. Jesus doesn’t want truth or love. He wants both.

“When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them because they were confused and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.” // Matthew 9:36

Compassion there means to “suffer with someone else.” Until we have compassion toward the “crowds” we face in life, the truth is ineffective.

Why is truth ineffective? Because the truth is only one half of a whole.

If our only goal is truth, we never get saved.

But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) // Ephesians 2:4–5

Being saved from the worst parts of ourselves only comes through grace. We must accept God’s gift of grace, but we also must be willing to give that same gift. Truth doesn’t save anyone. Only grace does. We all need grace.

If our only goal is grace, we never get free.

“And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” // John 8:32

We need both. Grace saves us, but truth sets us free. And the way to strike the balance between them is to walk in love. That is hard. Some moments require grace, some require truth, all require love.

Anyone who hates another brother or sister is really a murderer at heart. And you know that murderers don’t have eternal life within them. We know what real love is because Jesus gave up his life for us. So we also ought to give up our lives for our brothers and sisters. If someone has enough money to live well and sees a brother or sister in need but shows no compassion—how can God’s love be in that person? Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions. // 1 John 3:15–18

Do they need to change or do you?

There’s a difference between following Jesus and believing in him. It’s not just about eternity, it’s about the kind of world that we create today. That’s what Jesus was concerned with. People require compassion. To follow Jesus is to act like him.

We shouldn’t really focus on them. That’s been the problem all along. You may have read this and thought, “that’s right.” If so many of us feel this way, why aren’t we making more progress? Because the focus is still on externals. Other people, Christians or not. Them. Some people or community out there. We think they are the ones who need to change. Not us.

But it’s not about them, is it? It’s about you, and it’s about me. How well are we doing at this? You may be a Christian; you may not be. One thing we can agree on is that the world is a better place when people are more loving and more compassionate. Are you that person? Maybe they will never change. But you can. I can. There will always be a problem. There will always be a them. We don’t have to be part of the problem. We can be part of the solution. That requires us to exert a remarkable amount of control over our internals and practice equanimity every day. Because the only person we can force to be more loving is ourselves.

This way of love is simple to understand. Simple ≠ easy. That’s why we have the New Testament. It challenges us and gives us a glimpse into why this matters so much. It shows us, primarily through the life of Jesus, that God so loved the world. And it tells us that we can too, no matter how messy it is.

This is the invitation. Not to be a Christian, but to follow Jesus in doing this. To have the same thoughts, attitudes and actions that he had. Grace, truth, love.

This is why we need to know God. This is why we need to have faith in his plan, in Jesus. This is why we need to live by virtue. Because those are the tools that help us to love the world and, therefore, change it for the better.

Everything we have learned up to this point is meant to help us in applying this one commandment to our life.

Don’t just say it, live it. It will take every ounce of who you are to do this. To do this, you must have a personal understanding of how much God loves you, and you must let go of what you cannot control. You must have virtues, and you must decide that your life is about much more than you.

Why are the rules so important? Because every person should feel the same love that God expresses toward us. If we don’t live by the Great Commandment, we will live a life that is unloving. We will most certainly make the world around us a worse place.

If we decide to live by the rules, we should understand that God intends for us to make a positive impact on everyone we meet. We are meant to make the world a better place. Sometimes “the world” is the person standing right in front of us or commenting on our social media.

This requires deep work. Theology and philosophy intersect to help us do everything we can to play our part in the plan.

[1] 1 Corinthians 13:6, Ephesians 4:15